Spiritual Breakthrough

Hello readers, I hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday season. Thank you for spending a few minutes of your busy day with me. I had a really nice moment that I want to share with you all today. Before I do, let me just give a quick recap of who I am and my mission for this website, in case I have any new visitors.

My name is Kevin, and I’m a Puerto Rican male living with cerebral palsy from New Jersey. I serve on various state and national boards advocating for people with disabilities. The purpose of this website is to create conversations about faith, society, and disability. The Purposely Broken World produces two episodes a month. On the 1st and 15th of every month. With the accompanying blogs every Wednesday. In addition, every so often, I have a few contributors that add to the website. For example, Miss Betzy Lee hosts the Living the Extraordinary Life Podcast.

I will never charge for any work produced on this site. If you enjoy it, please leave me a few dollars in my Cash app or PayPal. There is also a link to support the podcast directly. Think of me as a musician just playing a song on the street. All links are above every post.

As a writer, I’m always finding myself in front of a keyboard, typing my way through an idea. It may not surprise you to find out that I have a journal where I write letters to Jesus. Essentially, they are my prayers. On rare occasions, I share them with a friend. After reading it, I was asked a simple question: “Why don’t you ask God to help you walk?”

This might sound naive or even strange, but I never gave it much thought. Once, when I was down the Atlantic City boardwalk, two inebriated gentlemen asked to pray over me. I didn’t want to be rude, and prayer is always good, so of course I said yes. They prayed that the demon would leave my body so I could walk. This was years before I was saved, so I didn’t take it seriously. Truthfully, I thought it was a bit rude. After all, they didn’t even say my name when they prayed.

I will not lie my disability can be exhausting. People think it’s all about not walking and not being able to do stuff. There is no day off, which can be annoying, but it is what keeps me up at night. Even the best mother has been known to hide in her bathtub for a few extra minutes. Any dad will admit that they have stayed in the driveway of their house just to finish a song before going in. I can’t go for a run when I feel stressed. Physical therapy is not the same thing as a workout at the gym. Like most people, when I pray, I ask for my family, my friends, and a loving partner to accept me. Here is a fact: God is not a genie. One of the biggest challenges as a Christian is accepting his will over your own.

I do not believe that God is not punishing me. I don’t believe I deserve to walk. My life purpose is to accept the gift of grace he’s giving me. I don’t have perfect faith. I also know that I don’t need to have perfect faith. I realized by thinking about this simple question that I’m not the man I used to be, nor am I the man I want to be. I think a lot of people like to pretend and lie to themselves about how strong they are in their faith as if they could show it off on Instagram. It’s okay to say you don’t understand God’s plan right now. It’s okay to say I’m willing to be God’s miracle. A miracle is more than just splitting the sea. It’s answering a text from my friend. It’s buying someone dinner. It’s doing a Bible plan with a friend. Faith is laughing until your ribs hurt. Faith is not being afraid to ugly cry.

I can’t say I’ve ever seen myself walking down the street. However, I never thought I’d be going to Washington DC, regularly to be the voice for others. I just made the arrangements for my next trip in April. I know I’m going to dance with Jesus one day. That’s what faith means to me. At the age of 36, here’s my new prayer.

‭‭John‬ ‭9:1‭-‬3‬ ‭NIV‬‬ [1] As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. [2] His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” [3] “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.

“Jesus,

My Lord and Savior. The keeper and protector of my faith. It would be wonderful to run, jump, and take showers by myself. If you’re willing, may I be healed physically so I may be able to do things like everyone else? So my life won’t be so hard.

More importantly, may I be healed spiritually. So that I may be a miracle for your glory to help others. My life may not be easy, but because of this journey you gave me, I’ve done more than I ever thought I would. I’ve surprised so many people, including myself. Keep the devil from me so I may continue to thrive. My life can get lonely, but I know that with you by my side, there will never be a moment alone. In the name of Jesus Christ, I say

Amen

Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this very personal testimony. Have a good day. Tell me in the comments: What do you pray for?

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