The Advocacy Life Podcast & Blog

Category: Commentary on Society

  • The Political Pizza Fight

    The Political Pizza Fight

    Do you want anything on your pizza? What toppings do you want on your pizza? What toppings do you not want on your pizza? Let’s assume you’re hosting a party for 10 people, and everyone wants pizza. A typical pizza usually has eight slices. Some people want pineapple, others want meat lovers, a few only eat vegetables on their pizza, and one person will only eat plain pizza. How do you raise money for the needed second pizza? Is it fair to ask people to pay for a pizza they are not planning to eat? Do you vote, and does the majority get what they want? What about everyone else? Should they go hungry? This crude scenario is an illustration of politics.

    “The art or science concerned with guiding or influencing governmental policy.” -Merriam-Webster dictionary

    Disability is a great way to understand politics. Politics will affect you at some point in your life, and so will disability. An Inconvenient truth is that these two are linked. How much should a wheelchair cost? How much should a person be allowed to make to maintain their Medicaid eligibility? At some point, everyone uses a Walker or a wheelchair. If your loved one requires any sort of extensive rehab or care, they will need Medicaid. One in three children in New Jersey receives some sort of Medicaid benefit. There is an illusion that disability will only affect the elderly or those diagnosed early in life. Disability can affect anyone at any time. 16-year-olds can have brain aneurysms and be changed forever. Eric LeGrand was only 20 years old when he became paralyzed on a football field.

    Mark 12:31 NIV  The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

    Disability must be part of the political discussion when children are taught civics in their social studies classrooms. Disability is a great representation of the human race. It goes beyond political parties. Don’t be so focused on the toppings on your slice of pizza that you forget about all those who need to eat from the same pie. In America, we all eat from the same pie. Political parties are not sports teams. Winning the White House should never feel like winning a World Series; it should feel like a new chapter in the great book of American history. Political parties play a vital role in the political process. However, over-reliance is dangerous. Our elected officials must always remember that they serve their constituents and not their parties. The American people must vote to hold those who are elected accountable. Casting a vote is not a decision that should be made lightly.

    “Alternate domination” of one party over another, and the associated desire for revenge, could lead to horrible atrocities and ultimately, a “frightful despotism”- George Washington.

    We need new disability advocates to enter the political arena and provide a fresh perspective. To remind all of us what the ideals of America should be. Disabled Americans are Republicans. Disabled Americans are Democrats. By getting a new perspective, Americans can see their boundless potential.

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  • Misunderstanding Words

    Misunderstanding Words

    “Dude, your car is awesome!” “This pizza is awful, I’m never ordering from here again!”

    If those sentences sound normal to you, think again. The words “awesome” and “awful” both come from the same root—meaning something overwhelming or filled with awe. Yet one now means something great, and the other, something terrible.

    Words change over time. But sometimes, we don’t realize how much meaning they still carry. Take “idiot” or “insane.” These words used to be medical terms used to describe people with mental disabilities. Even the New Jersey Constitution once said that “no idiot or insane person” could vote. Thankfully, that language was removed in the early 2000s. Still, words like these show how language can be harmful, even if we don’t mean it to be.I want to invite you to explore how the words we use can shape how we treat each other—especially people with disabilities.

    This might sound like just a matter of “political correctness” or semantics, but it’s more than that. Think about how some slurs are still used jokingly among friends but would be completely unacceptable from someone outside that group. Language isn’t just about words—it’s about context, history, and tone.

    Let me give you a real example. One night, I was out with friends. During our conversation, someone casually used the R-word. I cringed inside. No one meant any harm, but it still hit me hard. I didn’t want to turn the night into a lesson or make a scene. So, when the evening ended, I quietly pulled that person aside and explained why the word was offensive. They apologized, and that was it. No drama, no lecture—just an honest moment of learning.

    Being an advocate doesn’t mean I can’t have fun. It means choosing how and when to speak up, and doing it in a way that encourages understanding—not shame.

    Today, we talk a lot about acceptance, but we also need to practice tolerance. People will make mistakes. They’ll say the wrong thing. That doesn’t mean they deserve to be “canceled” or shut out forever. Words are tools. They can hurt, but they can also heal, build, and inspire change.

    A few years ago, comedian Kevin Hart made a joke about parenting that upset many people. Years later, it cost him a chance to host the Oscars. If we’re going to judge everyone by their past mistakes, we’ll never grow or forgive. We need to teach, not just punish.

    In the end, language is like comedy—it’s all about delivery. It’s not just what you say, but how you say it. Tone matters. Audience matters. Communication isn’t one-size-fits-all. We all make mistakes, but we can learn and do better.

    Thank you for reading. I hope this makes you think more deeply about the words you use—and how we can all become more mindful of the messages we send.

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  • For the Love of America

    For the Love of America

    I am a political nerd. I like to watch C-SPAN when I can. This week I knew something special was going to happen. In case you missed it, New Jersey Senator Cory Booker was on the Senate floor for over 25 hours. The man did not stop speaking. He did not sit down unless he was asked a question. He answered the question despite that, he did not sit down! Most Americans feel unheard by their elected officials. Many of the senator’s words were reading letters from his constituents to protect Medicaid. The Medicaid program is not healthcare, it is a lifeline for millions of Americans. Senator Booker, thank you for hearing us.

    I still don’t understand how cutting 880 billion dollars over 10 years is the best path forward for America. Are The prices of eggs going to go down? One in three children who use these benefits are they going to be okay? So many counties nationwide use the Meals on Wheels program to feed older adults. Can local municipalities be ready to pick up the cost? Can they even do so? Yes, the American way of life is expensive, but we cannot save costs at the expense of the most vulnerable. Individuals with disabilities are so strong they need the right support and the opportunities to show it.

    1 Corinthians 3:10 NIV By the grace God has given me, I laid a foundation as a wise builder, and someone else is building on it. But each one should build with care.

    I understand and will fully admit that the government can be way too big. I’m a capitalist through and through. This website is where I sell my books and other works. Americans do need more money in their pocket, but this is not how to do it. When a doctor takes a sample for a biopsy, they use a scalpel, not a hacksaw! If you are going to switch to a new mode of operation, then give people a chance to learn so they can follow it. This week, Secretary Kennedy and President Trump cut a lot of positions from the Department of Human Services. That is a prerogative. What’s wrong is how they do it. Depending on the position, they’re not offered a severance package. You cannot build America without its people.

    Is there a formula that decides what jobs are needed and what jobs are not? Are these decisions being made by artificial intelligence? How do you value an American life? I want the best for vongressional representatives, senators, and president Trump. I want the best for the American people. America will not be the best if we leave others behind. The next building, a strong future, means using all Americans.

    Senator Booker gave us a call to action. A lot of us cannot go, march in Washington, DC. I have another idea post video of your day post them all over social media. Show yourself getting out of bed with twheelsgiver. show yourself with your husband or wife going to the store. If you deliver Meals on Wheels, then take a picture with the person you gave the food to. Let those in power see the smiles on our faces. Help them remember that brief moment also built America. America is more than money. America is neighbors helping each other. America is everyone doing the part. America is alive. Either we all thrive or we will not survive. Thank you for your time.

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  • Comfortably undesirable

    Comfortably undesirable

    I was going to write another blog this week about protecting the rights of individuals with disabilities, but then I realized that this kind of blog also has to be shared because we also have the right as human beings to be loved and to be seen as sexual beings. As long as both individuals can consent and can fully comprehend what a relationship and or sexual encounter entails. Individuals with significant physical disabilities are discouraged from seeking any kind of romantic relationship. In movies and TV, they never show us in a realistic relationship scenario. We are saved for the “inspirational movie.” we are never seen going past a gentle kiss or a cute moment.

    As an individual with a disability, I have grown comfortable with my “different body.” However, in reality, it’s not different at all. I was born with ten fingers and ten toes—two legs and two arms—and most importantly, a heart. Over the years, I’ve learned that my disability can make me feel undesirable to the opposite sex. I can confidently speak in front of legislators and lobbyists, and I can maintain my balance, but the thought of talking to a woman instantly makes me sweat. Why is this?

    I don’t want this to be a “woe is me” narrative; rather, it’s a wake-up call to society regarding the choices they have made. Society often excludes us from love and relationships. We are not just children; we grow up to be adults, too.

    1 Corinthians 13:5-7 NIV It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

    Cartoon illustration of blind love or heart holding a cane

    Growing up, I looked up to physical specimens like Hulk Hogan and The Rock. However, none of them looked like me. As an adult, I noticed that the main character in “Fifty Shades of Grey” is a 6-foot-tall, muscular, very masculine man. When will people with disabilities be portrayed beyond their limitations? I believe that, at some point, they will remake “Basic Instinct.” Why not cast someone with a disability in those provocative scenes? In Hollywood, they now employ intimacy coaches to ensure that everyone feels safe during intimate moments.

    We know that the adult film industry is rife with human trafficking and abuse, including victims with disabilities, yet it often goes unnoticed. Our voices matter; our lives matter. I recognize that some men can be terrible. Women are frequently exposed to situations that allow them to be taken advantage of. The good guys tend to hesitate to approach women for fear of being perceived as a threat. By 2025, I’m sure every woman with a cell phone over a certain age will have received inappropriate pictures. As a result, women constantly keep their guard up. If a woman wants to be treated differently by a partner, she should seek a different kind of partner!

    If you search social media, you will likely find relationships where one person is paralyzed. I believe these relationships tend to be more socially acceptable because they were once considered “normal,” and there is a prevailing belief that those with such disabilities can do more for themselves. The concept of a disability hierarchy is another system designed to divide us. A human is a human; we all need love!

    I know I’ve covered a lot in this short blog, but that’s intentional. I want to encourage people to start having difficult conversations and become comfortable with being uncomfortable. By doing so, you will gain a better understanding of what it’s like to live with a disability.

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  • Coming Soon

    Coming Soon

    Greeting All Readers:

    Nobody knows this, but I’m writing a follow-up to my book Confessions From Disability Limbo released in 2021. I’m hoping to have the first draft done by 2025. As a treat, here are the first few paragraphs. I hope you enjoy it. please give me some feedback. I am looking for gut reactions

    Proverbs 11:25 NIV [25] A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.

    Greetings and warmest regards. I’m back with book number two! My name is Kevin G. Núñez, a 36-year-old male living with a developmental disability known as Cerebral Palsy. (CP) I use a wheelchair daily to help me ambulate throughout the day – in other words, no wheelchair, no legs. Additionally, I can’t get out of bed on my own or get dressed without the help of others. Things you take for granted are things I long for in life: driving, hugging someone, and even cleaning my backside.

    A quick disclaimer before I get rolling. I’m currently the vice-chairman of the New Jersey Council on Developmental Disabilities (NJCDD), and this work does not reflect them or any other advocacy organization that I have been a part of. No one has endorsed this, and I have not received any money upfront to write it. Bragging about my accolades is not the purpose of this writing. I’m going to do the exact opposite.

    Photo by picjumbo.com on Pexels.com

    I should have felt a sense of completion and joy when I clicked the “publish” button on Amazon’s Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) for my first book, Confessions from Disability Limbo. Yet, something felt out of balance, and without balance, we have nothing. I promise that I’m not writing this out of vanity. You see, I did not start out planning to write a book. I had a few successful blog posts to help grow my website. Then, I wanted to write some letters of appreciation to my family and friends for helping me get to where I am today.

    Up to that point, I mainly wrote about my life for my reflection. But I wrote my book for others. I wrote Confessions as if it were my first kiss: I didn’t know what I was doing, but I knew I had to share what was in my heart. As a result, I love my first book, and I stand by it, but I’m not too fond of the finished product. Confessions was and is beautiful. It holds a special place in my heart, but – to be honest – it’s wild and disjointed.

  • Never Forget

    Never Forget

    Apologies, this was supposed to go out on Thursday in honor of those who lost their lives on 9/11 but I was unwell and could not publish it. I’m reposting this blog  I feel there are still lessons we need to take away from the Horrific events of the 9/11 Terrace attacks. We must never forget!

    Some days in life are unforgettable, no matter how hard we try. As we passed another anniversary of September 11th, 2001, I can still vividly remember where I was: sitting in my 8th-grade social studies class when the announcement came over the loudspeakers about the horrific attacks at the World Trade Center. It’s hard not to wonder—what would those who lost their lives that day think of the world we live in now?

    I remember feeling hurt, confused, and angry. Race and religion didn’t divide us—we were united as proud Americans. There was no talk of kneeling during the national anthem, and political affiliations were the furthest thing from our minds. Fast forward over 20 years, and the country feels more divided than ever. We’ve stopped listening to each other. We’ve stopped valuing each other. Back then, when people lined up to donate blood, no one cared about skin color—all that mattered was that we all bled the same red.

    The president is just one man, and we can’t place the blame for all of the country’s problems solely on him. It shouldn’t matter who voted for him; what matters is that we respect him as a fellow human being, just as every person deserves respect. We’ve lost sight of the fact that we can disagree with someone without branding them as racist or socialist. Over 3,000 people died on that day, and their deaths weren’t in vain. They remind us of the importance of our unity and the right to protest without tearing each other apart.

    September 11th, 2001, isn’t about conspiracies or advancing social agendas. It’s about honoring the neighbors and heroes who made the ultimate sacrifice. It’s disheartening to think that more than 20 years later, we still haven’t fully learned the lesson they left behind—that we must stand united as a country and as a people.

  • Life and Time

    Life and Time

    Happy Wednesday, my dear friend. I want to begin this blog by saying thank you for your time. Time is such a strange gift, isn’t it? We can’t keep it. We can’t make more of it. We can only lose it, waste it, or make the most of it. When you have a disability like mine. Time seems to go slower. There’s no spontaneity in my life. Either I or someone else must plan every detail. Some days I feel like a tree is growing but not moving. This is not the ideal life, but I am so thankful for it.

    Click Here to Read the Rest: Life and Time

    Some people look at my life and think it must be a living hell. Once, I was walking through a mall. A father saw me look at his child and said, ‘’Thank God you’re not like them.” Referring to my brother and me, the tree grows vertically in the same way the spirit should. I remember feeling bad for this man. Yes, my pride was hurt. The comment was rude. I was wondering how you spent his time. Worrying and being scared. life has its own rhythms and seasons that we can’t possibly comprehend or control fully.

    ‭John 12:8 NIV “You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.”

    It’s easy to look past the tree because it doesn’t move; it just sits there. Sorry, I had to make myself laugh. it would be wonderful for me to always want to blog about all the things I’ve done and places I’ve gone. Those agreed memories and wonderful experiences, but that’s not my daily reality. Most days I’m in front of my tablet or laptop, making Zoom calls. I make sure my calendar is up-to-date. Everyone wants to live a life that is full of joy and great memories That’s a wonderful goal, but it’s not going to happen every day.

    I always get a little offended when someone says they’re bored. For those of us in the Western Hemisphere of the world, we have so many options for what to do with our time. I know that sounds foolish, but you don’t have to work wherever you work. You don’t have to pay your bills. Yes, there are consequences if you don’t. However, there are plenty of people content to live off the grid and off the land. There are people who make plenty of money at home playing video games. To become a doctor, you have to spend 8 years of your life in medical school.

    There are people who spend hours a week in chairs receiving chemotherapy. There are people who are spending their time behind bars. I know the local news has moved on, but there is still a war going on in Ukraine. You may be tired of scrolling through TikTok, but don’t forget about those who have become refugees to avoid bombings in Israel and Gaza. Life and time are about perspective. We have all felt like trees Once in a while, remember that the figure gives life. Without their oxygen, we can’t live, and without our carbon monoxide, they can live. Your life may not be perfect. Sorry to tell you this; it’s never going to be. You can be aware of how you spend your life and your time. As always, thanks for your time. See you next week!

    Moments of Brightness Newsletter

    Moments of Brightness Newsletter
  • Life Tips

    Life Tips

    Hello Readers,-

    So this week really got away from me It took me a long time to produce the next podcast, which will be released on April 1st. All I could think to do was come up with this quick list of tips to have a good life. I hope you guys enjoy it. As always, all comments are welcome.

    ‭‭Proverbs 1:5-6 NIV‬‬ [5] let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance— [6] for understanding proverbs and parables, the ayings and riddles of the wise.
    • Develop X-ray vision: Never take things at face value; the best-dressed man may be the biggest snake. The man who is smelly and brash may be the one who helps you the most. What good is it to dress up on the outside if you’re dead on the inside?
    • Give what you can and save what you can’t lose.
    • Regardless of what religion you follow, it’s safe to say we reap what we sow. So be careful with seeds you plant.
    • Always help when you can; don’t put it off for another day, because one day you will need the same help.
    • Knowledge is power, but with significant power comes great responsibility. So use it wisely.
    • Never stop learning, but realize you will never learn it all.
    • No matter how bad it seems, someone has it worse. What you throw away, someone else is already looking for.
    • Each breath we take is one we can’t get back, so remember to leave something good in this world for others to find after you have left it.
    • Learn the difference between living and existing.
    • Laugh like you never have before, and love like you always wanted to be loved.

    I know there’s a lot to unpack here, and I know that each one of these can be its own separate post. I also know that a lot of these things you probably heard before, sometimes we just need a reminder. I think that’s what I was really trying to do—just remind all of us of things the world has made us forget. Thanks for reading. See you guys next time. I love you all.

    latest Podcast Episode

  • A Valentine’s Day Message

    A Valentine’s Day Message

    Happy Valentine’s Day! I hope this blog brings some joy to your day. Over the weekend, many couples celebrated Valentine’s Day, which is honestly my favorite holiday. Even though we should show love to our friends and family every day, it’s easy to forget in the hustle and bustle of life. That’s why having a special day dedicated to love is so important.

    To me, Valentine’s Day isn’t about fancy gifts like flowers and chocolates. It’s more about showing genuine care and support for someone, even in small ways.

    Now, let’s talk about something important: advocating for people with disabilities. Before we get into it, I want to be clear. Some people with disabilities may not be able to understand or consent to romantic relationships, and that’s okay. But for those who can, it’s important to challenge misconceptions about what they’re capable of.

    ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13:4‭-‬5‬ ‭NIV‬‬ [4] Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. [5] It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

    Years ago, people with disabilities were often kept out of sight in institutions. But things are changing, just like they did for the LGBTQ community. It takes time, but education and breaking down stereotypes are key.

    Having a disability can make romantic relationships more challenging, but it’s not impossible. It just takes understanding and communication from both partners. There might be people who don’t understand or stare, but love knows no boundaries, whether one or both partners have a disability.

    It’s important to see the person beyond their disability. I’ll share links to two couples who are in integrated relationships to show that it’s possible. I promise to keep talking about this topic regularly in my blog because awareness is important, just like having accessible facilities.

    I’m sending love to everyone who needs it today, and I’ll see you next Wednesday!

    Sources:

    Roll with coal and Charisma

    Squirmy and Gloves

    Latest Moments of Brightness Newsletter

    Kevin for President
  • Lessons From Chess

    Lessons From Chess

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    Hi friends, I hope everyone is having a wonderful Wednesday. What are some of the hobbies or sports you like to participate in? I am 35 and have limited mobility due to my disability. So my options are limited. Yes, there are challenge or baseball leagues, and the Special Olympics has every sport you can imagine. I’m at the age where most other participants are either way too old or way too young. In addition, the concept of everyone getting a trophy or metal at the end doesn’t seem right to me. Most importantly, it would take 50 more steps if I just wanted to play wheelchair basketball for an hour. What if I just wanted to distract myself for a few minutes? Yes, there are plenty of video games with adaptive controllers. That truly is wonderful. However, I wanted something more realistic and a guaranteed challenge.

    “for gaining wisdom and instruction; for understanding words of insight; for receiving instruction in prudent behavior, doing what is right and just and fair;” Proverbs 1:2‭-‬3 NIV

    I recently discovered chess. I know the game of chess has been around almost forever, but it really is a brilliant game, and it has so much to teach us about life. I picked up the following lessons from playing the game, among others Have a good day, everyone. Let me know in the comments if anyone has tried playing chess and what they’ve learned from it

    • No matter how much you can or cannot move, you can still play even if someone else moves the pieces for you because every piece and square on the board has a name.
    • Chess is not for nerds! It’s a very social game you can always learn from other players. Especially in today’s world with players constantly streaming their matches. Players of all races are represented. There’s always someone waiting to connect even if it’s just to teach or play a game.
    • I currently have the lowest rating in all of Chess, but it is almost impossible to play the same game twice so you always constantly being challenged and learning a new strategy.
    • Every piece on the board has a specific role you have to see the big picture. I specifically enjoy this aspect because we get so focused in this world about what we’re doing in the moment we never take a step back to look at the whole board of life.
    • Most people when they start a plan of any kind. Get excited when they start a new project but lose interest in the middle and never get to the end. In chess the middle game is where the challenge really begins. The game will not end until the king is captured so you constantly have to keep adapting to a new scenario.
    • After you play games, you have to study your mistakes. In life people don’t want to learn from mistakes but in chess if you don’t analyze your past you can’t get better in the future.
    • Chess does not require physical strength, but strictly. Your mind and your heart working together.

    Disability Limbo Newsletter

    I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters

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