In the July episode of The Purposely Broken World, Kevin breaks down the worst day of his life to shine a light on depression and disability. Spiritual growth helped him find the light. Spiritual growth is just as important as mental and physical growth. In order to go forward, sometimes we have to reflect back. Subscribe to join the conversation.
Have you missed an opportunity, and it became a nagging thought in the back of your mind that you couldn’t shake? Not necessarily regret, simply something you always wondered about. A “what if” moment. Second chances don’t come along that often. especially if you have a disability. Most of the time, we don’t get a first chance. Well, for the first time in my life, I’ve been blessed with this second opportunity. I’m scared to take it, but I know I’m ready for it.
In case you didn’t read last week’s blog, here is a quick synopsis. In 2018, I attended the national SABE conference. Self Advocates Becoming Empowered is the leading independent advocacy organization run by and for people with disabilities. Every voting member on their board has to have a disability. The representatives divide the country into regions. New Jersey is in Region 7. Along with Pennsylvania, Delaware, Washington, DC, Maryland, Virginia, and West Virginia. At the last conference, I was given the opportunity to represent my region as an alternate. It was kind of last minute. I made a bunch of excuses and decided I wasn’t ready. The next conference was in 2020. That would have been plenty of time to make the right connections.
Honestly, over the years, I moved on from SABE. I thought it was going to be one of those moments in life. It’s been 3 years, and I haven’t had a conference due to the global situation. I was recruited to serve the region on an income basis. Until the next national conference Why me? I don’t deserve to do anything. So many people have died in the last three years with disabilities. How can I be their voice? I’m a goofball by nature. How can people trust me?
I’m a firm believer in God’s timing because it’s no coincidence that this opportunity opened back up after my big brother Jesus found me and picked me up. One of the things I have to do is put together a regional conference. A conference made up of every state that I will be representing to educate and collaborate on disability issues. Apart from all the duties of the national organization. I will not lie; I’m more than a little scared. Intimidation is an understatement.
New Jersey is a small state, and the advocacy community is very small. The organization and the region have been on hiatus. I have to make all new connections and all new contacts. There hasn’t been a regional conference in over 10 years!
"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:2 NIV
As I’ve said before, I never got to finish college. If, through the glory of God, I get to put together this conference, this will be my graduation. This is the hardest thing I have ever attempted. Zoom and Google Workspace will be tremendous resources. Something that was not discovered years ago. I need to give a huge thank you to the New Jersey Council on Developmental Disabilities for sponsoring me on this journey. By the time this is published, everything should be made official. Someone smarter than me once said, “Life begins outside your comfort zone.” This may not be professional for a blogger, but I’m asking that if you took the time to read this, please pray for me. Not for success. That’s all for God. I’m just looking for wisdom and strength. Never give up, because God won’t give up on you!
Special Announcement
I will be taking a small break for the rest of the summer to finish the first draft of my book. Confessions of a Wise Fool. The first draft is always the hardest and I want to get finished before I start working with SABE. I will be back with more blogs after Labor Day. I promise I will still be doing podcasts, so stay tuned to the website! Enjoy the summer.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
Note: The following blog was written in 2020 based on my life experiences. There have been some major life events that have occurred regarding this portion of my advocacy journey. Before I share that, I must share this for context. I hope you enjoy it, and I will provide part two next week.
The word independence always makes me laugh. Individuals with disabilities are always pushed to be more “independent.” No one is truly independent; we all need a little help. I need more than most; there’s no denying that. I have a very good support system to help me live my day-to-day life. They help me with such things as bathing, dressing, and bathroom necessities. For me, this is not a big deal. It is the only way I know life. If and when I do anything out of the ordinary, that’s when things get a little bit more complicated.
As I mentioned previously, my life as a disability advocate was very unexpected. I’ve been presented with several different opportunities, and I do my best to capitalize on as many as I can. At this stage in my life, I want to make as much of an impact on the lives of others as possible. I want the work I do to last. I don’t want a fancy award or a statue. Just to see tangible evidence of what I have done. The proof will be seeing the smile on someone’s face. The majority of my work focuses on system change. I don’t work against the system; I work within it to come up with common-sense solutions.
I was recently given the biggest opportunity of my disability advocacy career, but I don’t know if I can do it because of my disability. Trust me, I know how ironic that sounds. The position is as follows represent seven states on a national level to advocate on their behalf. The organization is called SABE.
Self-Advocates Becoming Empowered is a national self-advocacy organization. Run by and for people with disabilities, completely independent of any political affiliation. In July 2018. I attended their national conference. I was asked to seek one of the representative positions. I would represent seven states as their lead advocate. I decided then that I would give myself two years to get myself ready and make all the right connections.
I would only have to travel four times a year to attend the organization’s meetings. The rest I can do remotely thanks to modern technology like Skype and FaceTime. The tricky part is that I have to find one person who is willing to travel with me to help with my personal care four times a year for a 2-year term limit. Not many people would trust a stranger with personal tasks like this. I can’t help but feel guilty. I always feel like I’m bothering someone in some way. There is so much planning and preparation that takes place beforehand. Most get scared off. I do not have a lot of medical needs. Getting me ready for the day and getting me ready to go to sleep are the hardest parts. It’s those little things that people take for granted. That’s one of the main reasons I started this blog. I want to raise awareness about the real lives of people with disabilities.
I’m not afraid of doing the work. Some people will be hard to deal with. I am sure about that. I still have to write up the proposal to acquire the funds I would need to attempt this venture. I know I must try. The purpose of life is to live life. I know there’s a good chance I will fail. Even if I get everything I need, there’s no guarantee I will win the election for the position. I don’t want to say, “What if?” I want to say, “I did.”
“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.” Proverbs 16:9 NIV
2020. I laughed while typing those numbers. The year the world changed, I spent two years calling people in different states. I would tweet their state organizations to introduce myself. To get ready for the next conference. I found people willing to do my personal care. Like everybody else, they postponed their conference, but not by one year but by two instead. 2022. In today’s world, that’s a lifetime! The disability community has always had a lot of turnover. In two years, every person I talk to will most certainly be gone.
I never say never to anything, but it’s impossible to know where my life will be by then. Planning from 2018 to 2020 was easy because the world was in its established routine. Now there is no routine. One of the main reasons I wanted the position was to travel across the country four times a year. I’ve only ever gone to Puerto Rico and Disney World. It would have been cool to see new places.
I am looking for a new opportunity to make a difference for both the world and myself. What opportunities have you not taken advantage of? What things have not worked out for you? I hope this gives you something to think about. Thank you for your time. Another blog will come next Wednesday, as usual. All comments are welcome.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
The Purposely Broken World, part of the Advocacy Life podcast network, is now offering two episodes a month, one on the first and one on the 15th. In this episode, Kevin recounts his first dance experience as a person with a disability. Please support this podcast. Support the podcast with a monthly donation.
Hi friends, I hope everyone is having a wonderful Wednesday. What are some of the hobbies or sports you like to participate in? I am 35 and have limited mobility due to my disability. So my options are limited. Yes, there are challenge or baseball leagues, and the Special Olympics has every sport you can imagine. I’m at the age where most other participants are either way too old or way too young. In addition, the concept of everyone getting a trophy or metal at the end doesn’t seem right to me. Most importantly, it would take 50 more steps if I just wanted to play wheelchair basketball for an hour. What if I just wanted to distract myself for a few minutes? Yes, there are plenty of video games with adaptive controllers. That truly is wonderful. However, I wanted something more realistic and a guaranteed challenge.
“for gaining wisdom and instruction; for understanding words of insight; for receiving instruction in prudent behavior, doing what is right and just and fair;” Proverbs 1:2-3 NIV
I recently discovered chess. I know the game of chess has been around almost forever, but it really is a brilliant game, and it has so much to teach us about life. I picked up the following lessons from playing the game, among others Have a good day, everyone. Let me know in the comments if anyone has tried playing chess and what they’ve learned from it
No matter how much you can or cannot move, you can still play even if someone else moves the pieces for you because every piece and square on the board has a name.
Chess is not for nerds! It’s a very social game you can always learn from other players. Especially in today’s world with players constantly streaming their matches. Players of all races are represented. There’s always someone waiting to connect even if it’s just to teach or play a game.
I currently have the lowest rating in all of Chess, but it is almost impossible to play the same game twice so you always constantly being challenged and learning a new strategy.
Every piece on the board has a specific role you have to see the big picture. I specifically enjoy this aspect because we get so focused in this world about what we’re doing in the moment we never take a step back to look at the whole board of life.
Most people when they start a plan of any kind. Get excited when they start a new project but lose interest in the middle and never get to the end. In chess the middle game is where the challenge really begins. The game will not end until the king is captured so you constantly have to keep adapting to a new scenario.
After you play games, you have to study your mistakes. In life people don’t want to learn from mistakes but in chess if you don’t analyze your past you can’t get better in the future.
Chess does not require physical strength, but strictly. Your mind and your heart working together.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
Hello, wonderful humans! Most people will say that God or some divine force is always with us, but how do we get access to him? It’s easy to save things like reading the Bible or going to a house of worship. Let us do that. However, what if you can’t read or get out of the house easily? The tagline for this website is “Disability and Spiritual Awareness.” I believe this post will embody that message. I identify as a Christian, and this is part of my spiritual journey. I have no intention to start a spiritual debate at this time. These are the tools that I use daily as a person with a disability to spend time with our wonderful creator. This list of resources is based on my personal experiences. Click on each link to learn more. If this topic does not interest you, you are more than welcome to come back next week.
All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 NIV
YouVersion/ Bible appThis is the most popular app people use because it is available in multiple languages and can be read to you in various languages. You can also highlight in different colors. I can read however with my disability my eyes don’t always want to track To the end of the line. My eyes like to jump down a few lines. It’s not like dyslexia where the letters get jumbled up. I can read effectively it just takes a lot longer.
Through The Word(TTW) When I began my journey through scripture, I did not know where to start All I knew is I couldn’t start on page one. In an audio guide, a pastor breaks down each chapter. A one-on-one Bible study. Right there in my headphones. All the themes are separated into journeys. Most of the pastors are men, as a disabled man sometimes it is more relatable to hear from another man. They just did a series called The Manhood Talks To encourage men with faith issues.
Blue Letter Bible This app is designed specifically for Bible study It has tons of audio guides and commentaries to break down scripture. When you study the word you always have tons of questions This app helps answer them.
Day One Journal This is not an app designed for Bible study. This is where I write down all my thoughts and prayers at the end of the day. I love Jesus but I’m not really good at talking to him throughout the day This is how he and I spend quality time together.
Vizion Church-YouTubeSince the outbreak of the pandemic, there have been thousands of virtual worship services. I wasn’t sure which one to try because all of them are fake and want money. I was determined not to join any of them. One day, the Holy Spirit said to look up the prodigal son. I came across Pastor Tyson’s sermon, and something just clicked. I don’t know how else to describe it. Since June of last year, I have not missed a Sunday service The pastor doesn’t know who I am. The only one who interacts with me is whoever runs the chat on Sunday live session The Holy Spirit does the rest.
The Righteous of God Facebook GroupAnother part of my stubbornness was that I would not join any Facebook groups because those are where most of the hypocrites are. Anyone can post anything they want, but do something different behind the screen. This group is run by an old friend of mine from school A person who’s not ashamed of their past and is not afraid to tell it like it is. They have several discussion boards and will always respond to every question. The leaders of the group will simply be there for you.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
The following was an opinion piece Kevin Nuñez wrote for the Burlington County Times in March 2020. Click here to read
I am a 32-year-old disability advocate living with cerebral palsy. I am of sound mind and spirit, and I’m inviting you to go down a linguistically inspired rabbit hole with me to start a much deeper conversation about human awareness and language.
Before beginning, I know what I’m about to say is controversial and might raise more questions than answers. I am trying to make people aware of the way we are communicating with one another. Unlike Alice in Wonderland, we cannot wake up from this nightmare. Just like my disability, it will not disappear. This should be an ongoing conversation, with people allowed to draw their own conclusions. We should learn to understand the meaning behind words and phrases before we use them. If we look up the etymology of most words, we would find a negative connotation for most of them.
My function as an advocate is to educate and collaborate with others to better the lives of those affected by disability. I have come to realize that I am more of a human advocate, because everyone has a disability.
One day, I was giving an orientation to new direct support professionals (DSPs) on how to treat individuals with respect and so forth. Later that night, I was out with friends whom I have not seen in a long time. During the conversation, they jokingly used the R-word once. I did not want to break up the conversation and begin a lecture on disability and why the word is offensive. No one at the table was trying to be offensive; there was no malice behind it. I immediately cringed internally. What was I to do? I can’t wear my advocacy hat all the time. I have the right to have fun as well.
The simple believe anything, but the prudent give thought to their steps.- Proverbs 14:15 NIV
When the night ended, I pulled the one person aside and simply explained the situation. That person apologized, and that was the end of it. There was no need to cause a scene in the middle of a restaurant. I did not have to shame them in front of everyone. We didn’t have to stop being friends because they made a mistake. All I had to do was express myself in a calm way and make sure they didn’t forget it.
These days, everyone preaches acceptance, but we also need to preach tolerance. People will say the wrong thing. This does not mean they should be punished for the rest of their lives. Words are tools, like hammers and knives. Yes, they can be used to hurt. They can also be used to build and create wonderful statements that can change the world. We are so quick to destroy anyone who says something we don’t like, instead of educating them to make the change.
Comedian Kevin Hart made a joke many years ago about how he would discipline his son if he ever said he was gay or transsexual. At the last Oscars ceremony, Hart was scheduled to host. There was such a huge uproar about his statement that he removed himself. If we are going to judge every word every person ever said, then we should all put tape over our mouths and learn to communicate telepathically.
In conclusion, language is like comedy — totally subjective. It’s not what you say; it’s how you say it. Tone and delivery matter. Think of it like this: Have you ever texted someone and then had to send another text immediately after to explain it?
How we communicate is like driving. Everyone does it a little differently. We have all sped up and broken a rule once in a while. We may cause a major tragedy, a tiny fender bender, or get away with it.
We can do only so much. First of all, know your audience. Find the most effective way to deliver your message. Learn to accept feedback and reactions. Most importantly, be patient with how to respond to someone’s message back to us.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalms 139:14 NIV
My name is Kevin Nuñez I live with Cerebral Palsy and I cannot do the simplest tasks like tie my shoes. In my senior English class, I had to write a practice essay question for college applications. For some, I’m sure it was just a silly assignment. For me It’s something I never forgot. “If life had a reset button, would you press it? Like every big decision, they’re pros and cons, so let me give you both of them before I give you my answer.
The negatives: Lack of spontaneity, because I need help from others to do so many daily tasks, I rarely get the feeling. I’m just doing what I want when I want it. Everybody likes the idea of staying in bed an extra 15 minutes. What if you can’t get out of bed until your caregiver shows up for their shift? Feeling like a burden, I have had so many family and friends rearrange their schedules just to include me and sacrifice so much. That it honestly hurts me I just want to run away when in fact that is the last thing I can do. The disability community is the largest under-served population in the USA. That is because they lock us into a system of poverty. It’s simple, the belief is if you work you’re not disabled. That doesn’t consider so many obvious factors most insurance companies Don’t cover wheelchairs or other daily used devices. You want to strengthen to be the best person you can be the fact is you cannot. At 33 It’s no longer amusing to be single. Finding someone to share your life with is simply part of the human experience. Disability and relationships sometimes don’t mix well. Some people Will never give you a chance to see you as anything more. People have their little check boxes of what they think a partner should be. People were not designed to be put into boxes.
The positives: The kindness and generosity of others, This world can be really dark. I have seen the very best in people. I find the light and the goodness in everyone. No one is all bad, despite what others say. The willingness to not give up so many people who have “everything” Simply choose to do nothing with it. I never look to be an inspiration. However, if I make one person strive to be better through my actions. Then I have helped the world and we should all want to leave the world better than you found it. God’s blessings, I have had so many fortunate and unique adventures that would not have happened if it was not for this disability. From Being on a local radio show as a little kid. To meet with legislators in Washington, DC. I can’t say that me and God have had the best relationship over the years, but I have definitely become a man of faith. I am so grateful for all that I have. I may not have had a lot of relationships to brag about, but I have stayed friends with all them. The simple fact is If you give a person with a disability a chance. You see that the relationship is much deeper and fulfilling because we go past all the typical surface issues that most people cannot get past.
I am well aware some of you out there would gladly say that you would press the restart button. Regardless of If you had a disability or not. My point is simply this, We have to stop looking at the bad. So we can find the good. By doing this, you do not deny the bad. You are just searching for a unique perspective. Will fully admit, there is no longer a straightforward answer to this question. Some days are tough. That’s just part of life. My answer is still the same as it was all those years ago. I cannot and we’ll never wish to start my life over again.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
Salutations to my dear friends. I hope you guys are all enjoying the early days of spring. Every once in a while, we all need a pick-me-up. I decided to write one for my fellow individuals who may be having a hard time right now. Please read or share this with any individuals with a disability of any kind who are going through a difficult time. I, the writer, have a disability, so I hope my words can provide additional comfort. What I’m going to do to make this writing a little more digestible, is list ten brief statements for you to ponder over. Please note the order does not indicate importance; it’s just the way it came out of me.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalms 139:14 NIV
Just because there is something medically wrong with you does not mean there’s anything wrong with you. Scientifically one in four people are diagnosed with some form of developmental disability. It is universally understood that no human is perfect, therefore there has to be something wrong with everyone.
Don’t let your bad days distract you from remembering the good days.
You are under no obligation to accept someone’s evaluation of you.
Everyone always fights for what they want, don’t let them make you feel less than for doing the same.
Your disability cannot stop you from having a life, only you can do that. Learn the difference between existing in living.
if you want people to see you as a person, you must do it before the public does.
Your disability does not give you an excuse to treat others any less than you want to be treated.
Learn to rest and exercise both your mind and your body.
We are never abandoned without a gift. Once you learn what yours is, do not be afraid to use it.
Find a small circle of friends, not a large number of acquaintances.
I pray this small blog finds someone who needs uplifting and encouragement. Remember, you are not given anything you cannot handle. Thank you for reading, and I hope to see you soon.
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
Hello, my good friends, I hope your day is going well. The idea for this blog took me a bit to develop. Frankly, I wasn’t sure if I could even write about this topic. Then I figured it couldn’t do any harm, so here we go. What do you need to be a talented writer? Before I begin, I must issue a small disclaimer. I do not have a degree in journalism, creative writing, or anything like that. I’ve said this many times. The only accreditation I’ve ever had is a basic high school diploma. So remember, while these suggestions are coming with the best of intentions, take them with a grain of salt.
There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. 1 Corinthians 12:4-5 NIV
If you love writing, then you are a writer! If you write every day, then you are a writer! Don’t let anyone tell you differently.
Unlike a movie that a thousand people can see at a time, only one person can read your words at a time. So write to just that person.
Writing is a challenge. The page always starts blank. If it was not a God-given talent, everyone could do it.
It doesn’t matter if you’re writing about pink elephants or the cheesiest erotica novel, if you spend your time and energy on it, be proud of it.
When you’re writing you are sharing a piece of yourself with the world, if you don’t love what you wrote then don’t publish it.
Always have a TEAM of editors you trust. If you don’t like objective criticism, then don’t share your work with them.
This is not the 1800s reading is no longer the accepted medium to share information. do not be offended when people don’t read your work. Put bluntly, “Writing is not sexy.”
Writing is about making a connection, and it does not mean you can connect with every person in the world. With enough connections, you make an impact to change.
Despite what any English teacher would have you believe, there are no rules. So write what you know and write what you believe.
If you’re not having fun, then you’re doing it wrong.
I know these suggestions might not make you the next Hemingway or F Scott Fitzgerald, but I hope they make you think about the gift you have and how to use it. It took me a long time to focus and harness my writing style. This is a tiny blog with a tiny following. Share this with anyone who you think might gain something from it. Have fun, and above all NEVER STOP WRITING!
Disability Limbo Newsletter
I started Letters from the Limbo as a way to connect with you on a deeper level. Twice a month, I send out an email filled with personal anecdotes, professional updates (like my recent reelection as Vice Chair of the NJCDD), and the policy insights I don’t share anywhere else. This isn’t just another email—it’s an unfiltered look at the life of a disability advocate. Join my community and get an exclusive, honest look at the work that matters
The Advocacy Life Podcast & Blog 